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Ramonas Story

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My friend, Ramona, who has experienced so many
tragedies in her life, is still optimistic.
Read on, and find out why...
 

 

When you were little, do you remember knowing a child to whom, it seemed, everything happened? It could have been a neighbor child, a brother or sister, or even yourself. I say that Im not accident prone, but the following scenarios are mine and began when I was an adult.

I lived in Maryland since I was a child. I was raised in the Church and Im so grateful for that upbringing! My mother took my sister, my brother and me to Sunday School, Sunday morning Church Service, Training Union, Sunday evening Church Service, Wednesday evening Prayer Meeting and choir practice on Tuesdays. When we were teenagers we had Fellowship Meetings and Socials. I accepted Christ as my savior and was Baptized on April 11, 1961. I still have the bible that the Morningside Baptist Church presented me on that date.

I have tremendously strong faith! This is a gift from God. The Holy Spirit is with me, as it was when I was young. I can't imagine living without Christ in my life. He is my strength and happiness; however, this was not always true. When I became an adult, I got away from the Church. I began doing only what I wanted to do. I made many mistakes not living the life I had been taught. I am now thankful for the values I learned as a child, including the family values my parents taught me.

I became chronically ill with Juvenile Diabetes (Type 1) when I was 19 years old. Im 58 now. Over the years, I learned how to manage and live successfully with diabetes. It can be done with just a little, good, change in your life. You must have some discipline in the choices and amount of foods you eat, and a little basic exercise, like walking or riding a bike. Living a great life with diabetes is attainable. My attitude back then was Why me? thy should I have an incurable, chronic disease, and so young? I felt like God turned His back on me. I didn't pray. I didn't keep God in my life.
I slowly began changing from those ways. Several friends of mine passed away and I was thinking, Where did their souls go? I wanted to become a member of a church but failed to find a denomination where I felt I really belonged.

I met Wade Cappetta and we were married in the Presbyterian Church that I was attending. I got pregnant when I was 35 years old. Being the first pregnancy, my age, and having diabetes for sixteen years, made the pregnancy a high risk, for both me and the baby. I followed instructions, ate correctly, and worked at the Census Bureau until I delivered. When my diabetic body couldn't take anymore, the placenta had started to calcify and the baby had less than 24 hours to live. I delivered Glenn Wade five and a half weeks early. It was an emergency Caesarean birth. We had much anxiety about his health, but he turned out to be a real winner. No problems with G. Wade, and he didn't have to go to the High Intensity Neo Natal Care Unit, which was right there in the GWU Hospital. On the other hand, I survived with a blind spot in my right eye and a plethora of medical problems which took a very long time to overcome. My doctors were concerned about my eyesight and overall health with the pregnancy. Their concern was that if I ever got pregnant again, I would lose my vision entirely. That problem was fixed. The lesson here is that I took care of myself, and baby and momma were fine.

After G. Wade was born, diabetes caused my thyroid to slow down, called hypothyroidism. However, better living through chemistry, I take a pill everyday, along with my insulin and other pills for medical treatments. It works though. I feel great most every day. Now, there was a child to raise. How was this child going to be raised? It was my responsibility to bring G. Wade up in the Church. That was the catalyst to depending upon Christ in my life again. I took G. Wade to Sunday School and sent him to Bible School in the summers. We moved to Crofton, Maryland, in 1991. We belonged to the Community United Methodist Church, and this is where G. Wade was brought up. He was confirmed in the Church, while he was in eighth grade, and he is a spiritual person.

When I was 52, both of my eyes starting bleeding at the same time!
The doctors thought it must have been caused from the diabetes. There was no other known reason at that time. I had diabetes for 33 years and I was told, at the beginning of my diagnosis, that if my eyes ever hemorrhaged or the retinas detached, I would go totally blind! There was no other known reason for the eyes to bleed, so the diagnosis was peripheral diabetic retinopathy. I could barely see at all for most of a year. It was like looking through dense, black spider webs. I was house bound for 11 months. I couldn't drive and had to rely on people to help me at home and take me everywhere. For the next two years I went through seven major eye surgeries and five intense laser surgeries to repair my eyes. The surgeries did not exist when I first got diabetes.

I was retired on disability from the Federal government, after 33 years of service and being only 52. I was in the zenith of my career! Chief, of the Operations Center, was my position. I built the new operations center based on cutting edge software. HP developed OpenView, which is software centered on communication traps that my engineering staff captured over the network for all of the applications, e.g., computer systems, the network, security, building environments, etc. The Operations Center was 24x7x365 with three staffs of monitors around the clock. Anyway, you can see that I was really into my job and I was devastated when my eyesight failed and I had to retire! This was not my plan. With my tremendous belief and faith in God, I knew I was not to work at that job any longer. My medical problems were not over, not by a long shot!

I was seeing well again. This was a miracle in my life, a blessing from God! I have a slight lack of peripheral vision, but not enough to keep me from getting my drivers license, in two states. I could not afford my share of the house mortgage, on my retirement income. So, my friend, Ray, and I sold my dream house that we had built. He moved to England, where he had worked with a contracting company. Wade, then 17 years old, and I moved to the panhandle of Florida, right at the beginning of a new school year. Ray and I have remained close friends to this day.

Son Wade and I were living on a barrier island in a rental beach house on the Gulf of Mexico. We were waiting on our permanent home to be built. I don't know why I even use the word permanent? When I use that word, it never quite turns out that way. We just loved living on that island! You could see the Gulf of Mexico all along the back of the house and the sound side all along the front. Sitting on the deck, you could see water everywhere and everything that goes along with a beach, like sand, waves, palm trees, sail boats, ships, barges, motor boats, swimmers, etc. We had to cross a bridge from the mainland to get to the island. It was such a unique experience crossing a long bridge to get to your home. We lived there eight months. It was a little piece of heaven!

My traumatically bad health continued. I had a severe stroke March 2nd, of 2004! I was paralyzed on my left side. I under went a profusion of tests to find out why I had a stroke. There were no test results that definitively stated why. The hospitalist said it must have been caused by your, guess what, diabetes?! It could have been, if I had years of diabetic mismanagement. But that was not true and I had blood tests to prove it. I spent ten days in the hospital and a month in a rehabilitation facility. My house was completed during that time. The banks, never missing a beat, came to the rehab center and we went to settlement there! My dear mother, and aunt and uncle, came from Tennessee to Florida, and with Wade, who was still a senior in high school, moved us out of the beach house to the new place. I joined them mid-April. I was in a wheelchair and just learning how to walk. Home therapy came in and I got stronger. I was walking on a walker when I started going to outpatient physical therapy. Some long time friends who lived in Washington, DC, called and gave me some excellent advice. Take Hyperbaric Oxygen treatments. If I could get Oxygen to the idling cells in my brain, then I would have a better chance of recovery. I did just that, and there was a treatment center very close to the hospital. My mom stayed for two and a half months taking care of Wade and me, all the while setting up the home, the kitchen, linen closets, curtains, bookshelves, etc. She drove me around, too. Can you imagine a little, 80 year old, lady, from Fall Branch, Tennessee, driving us around Pensacola, Florida? We have quite a few trips to remember, and she was heaven sent! Another blessing.

Wade graduated high school and we had a big graduation party. My dad and sister, Joanne, drove down, and mom's two sister and other relatives came over from Lakeland, Florida. Wade's father flew down from Maryland and stayed in the Holiday Inn on the island, with a gulf view. Wade met a girl, while working at McDonald's. Jen is her name, and they are still together today! They live in Tampa, Florida, now. They work and go to school, and are completely on their own. I'm very proud of Wade for that. It is first love for both of them and they are still in love!

Mom went back to Tennessee. Dad really missed her. Things in Florida were okay. I was recovering from the stroke, and life was generally good. Then I heard some astounding news on the television. It was a Thursday morning, September 30, 2004, and blaring out of the TV every few hours was the news that greatly effected me. If you take the medication VIOXX, STOP immediately! It has been pulled off the global market and has been found it could cause heart attacks, strokes and even death. Then I realized what that really meant to me. I had been taking Vioxx for four and a half years. I took it that day, the day of my stroke, and got back on it after I got out of rehab. This is why I had the stroke. Finally, I knew why! Since then I've spoken to many doctors, and they say the medication contributed to having the stroke. It seems to be complicated but, I had a stroke while I was on Vioxx. It constricts blood vessels, and is a contraindication to aspirin, which I was taking to increase blood flow.

Wade and Jen were going to Pensacola Junior College (PJC), fall semester of 2004. It was hurricane season. The Florida panhandle and gulf coast towns were at risks, but, I had researched the area before moving there. It had been ten years since a serious hurricane hit that part of the gulf. The last one was hurricane Opal in 1994. I had no reason not to move there, plus we had some friends and wonderful cousins nearby. This year was a weather exception, an exceptionally BAD one! Ivan smashed right into Pensacola! We were forced to evacuate. I watched the devastation from the farm, mom and dad's place in Fall Branch, Tennessee. Wade and Jen went to Riverview, Florida, Jen's parent's home. No one knew what to expect, but, my house was only five months old. It should still be there? Ivan was a category 3 hurricane. The whole place, mainland and islands, looked like a third world country! The older buildings were obliterated! Lots of them were nowhere to be found! The roads on the island were covered by 2-3 feet of sand. Not a pretty picture. However, there was nothing wrong with my house! My development was built to code. All of the houses were still standing. The fences were ripped up, but, hey, that's not bad!

My arthritis was still bothering me. It is true that Vioxx made me feel great. The salesmen's pitch was that Vioxx was a miracle drugs. I believed that had some merit, until the day the truth came out! I went to my orthopedist in Florida, and he gave me another medication. He said it was for arthritis type pain, it was made by Pfizer, not Merck Pharmaceuticals, and there had been no adverse side effects on the medication. So, I took the Bextra. It wasn't as good as the Vioxx, but I was getting some relief. I was not apprehensive about taking Bextra.

Another turn of events, PJC had been hit badly by Ivan. The school refunded all the tuition monies to the students. Wade and Jen decided to take their money and run. They moved to Riverview, Florida, and went to school there. I had a decision to make. What should I do? Wade was not living nearby and I was disabled? My cousin and his family lived in the next town down, and helped me as much as possible. It wasn't like Maryland, where I had my brother, Jerry, and some responsive, longtime friends. I decided to sell my house and move back to Maryland. I knew from Annapolis to Boston, there are good doctors, the best. The medical expertise in this area alone is top of the class and cutting edge with medical solutions.

I found out, with every problem in your life comes opportunities. The outcome is variable, depending upon what you choose to make of them. With the loss of homes in the area, real estate went sky high for decent properties. I sold my home in less than a week, at a very good price.

I packed up again, with the help of mom and Joanne, and hit the road to go 1050 miles back to Crofton, Maryland. I had made appointments with all of my prior doctors. Then, nine days after I returned to Maryland, I had the big one. I had another stroke!!! Only nine months after the first one, December 9th, 2004. This was very unusual to have major strokes so close together, while youre on stroke preventing medications! This stroke hit both sides of my brain. Clots bombarded both hemispheres. I thought I was leaving this earth. Lying on the stretcher in the emergency room for almost 24 hours, I could feel my body degrade, little by little, major part by major part. My neck lost strength so I couldn't lift my head. My core muscles stopped working so I couldn't sit up. My arms, my legs, physically, nothing was working, except I was still thinking. I could swallow and open and close my eyes. I was paralyzed again. At first, I was afraid. With both sides being hit, what was going to come back? I kept praying and repeating Psalm 23 and the Lord's Prayer in my mind. Yea, thou I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil. Thy rod and thy staff will comfort thee.

The brain is absolutely amazing! It has the potential to rewire itself neurologically in the event it gets damaged. I hadn't fully recovered from the first stroke. The left leg was slow and not very strong. I walked with a cane and had a limp. My left shoulder was not moving very well, but that state was livable. Now what??

After the hospital stay in Annapolis, I went to an Acute Stroke Rehabilitation Center, Kernan, part of the UMD, in Baltimore. It was a highly rated stroke and brain trauma rehab center. That was just what I needed. I'll never forget my delivery to the center. I couldnI colden't move. I was lying flat on my back, moving my eyes and I could talk a little. I was placed in a single room, and the nurses and attendants had to do everything for me! They had to lift me, change my clothes, feed me, wash me, raise and lower my bed, put pillows under me. They had to lift me out of bed and put me in a wheelchair. At first they pushed me to the areas with the other patients, dining room, therapy area, and gym. Then I learned about their strategy. If the patients don't do things themselves, then theyI'll never learn how to get along by themselves. This is where the hard part came in. I learned to move my arms so I could try to roll my wheelchair. They still had to move me from the bed to the chair, and they would push me when I became exhausted. Their strategy worked. I slowly learned to feed myself, brush my teeth, hold a fork and pencil, sit on a bench, take a shower, and wash my hair. I stayed there until the beginning of the new year.

Ray had moved back from England to Crofton and he had purchased a house there. He had invited me to stay at his house, so, I went there after I was released from Kernan. My brother, his family, and my dearest friends visited me, even gave me a party. My family and friends have never let me down, in all that has happened to me. This is another blessing from God! Ill never forget moving back to Ray's house. I couldn't walk yet. I was too weak and my legs were not recovered to the point that I could use them. I was using my wheelchair. Ray had to go to the grocery store, so I stayed, laying on my back, on the couch. My head was on a pillow and I could watch TV or read, but that was all I could do. My cell phone rang and it scared me. It was Ray, making sure I was still okay and nothing else had happened to me. A day later, my wonderful sister came and stayed with me for three weeks! What a God send! She has always had a nurturing character, and I, unfortunately, have had to have way too much attention from her! Joanne took me to physical therapy three times a week. She would shop and I would sit in the car. She took care of me and I was slowly getting stronger.

Joanne went back to North Carolina. My cousins brought my mother to Maryland, and my father came with them. It was January 19th, 2005, and there was a snow storm forecast, but it wasn't supposed to hit the area they were traveling. Going across Rt 64 in Virginia, cutting through, high in the mountains, it started snowing (of course), there was ice, and the fog was dense. The traffic came to an abrupt stop! Fortunately, my cousin had quick responses to turn sharply, drive on the side of the lanes and avoid hitting anyone! God was with my family, keeping them safe. My mother was there for me again, helping me in the house, driving, and getting the wheelchair in and out of the car. She is a very strong woman, spiritually and for being in her eighties, physically!

The second stroke did far worse damage than the first one. Maybe it was the combination of the two strokes? My left side, being hit twice, has never recovered. From my toes to my shoulder and fingers, I have lack of control. My left knee is the worst. The nerve cells, needed to make the muscles move, are not working. The wiring from the brain mostly recovered the first time, but the second time the pathways are not connecting. Walking is a challenge. I can walk, just not very far before I have to stop and rest. I walk with a quad cane because the balance part of my brain was hit a little, but, I'm good. With my faith, I have the strength, courage and guidance to lead a close as possible I normalyI life. What I can't do, my dear friends and family help me with.

It was April, 2005. Listening to the radio I hear some incredible news. I BextraI has been yanked off the market worldwide, citing health risks! Not just one medication, but two of those I was on, approved by the FDA, caused strokes, heart attacks and death! I could be worse than I am. Every morning, when I awaken, I pray to God, thanking Him for the new day, and thanking Him that I'm still here and as independent as I am. I could be a lot worse.

I moved into a townhouse directly above Crofton, right off Rt. 3, in Gambrills, Maryland. The reason I moved there was because most of the townhouses have there own elevators. Today, I still live in Crofton Gate and the elevator has proven to be invaluable. Now, the last two events of my story have come to pass.

Three days after I moved into the townhouse, March 2, 2006, I was waiting for the floor company representative to arrive. The family room had carpeting and I was having it replaced for ease of use and to match the rest of the wood flooring. I had unlocked the front door in anticipation of Chris. The furniture was not well arranged for my needs, just moving in. I always have a cup of coffee in the mornings. That day, I wanted another cup. I fixed it and sat on a stool at the tall bar in the kitchen. I had the hot cup in my hands and the doorbell rang. I get jumpy quite easily due to the nerve damage. I tried not to spill the coffee, but I lost my balance and my left leg couldn't stop the fall. I fell straight over, with all my weight, onto my hip. The femur bone broke at the hip socket! I went to the hospital and had surgery to put my hip back together. There were three, four inch, screws put in to insure the bones would not move. After three days in my usual hospital, I went to the Crofton Convalescent Center for a couple of weeks with rehab. Once again, my dear mother came to Maryland to take care of me. Being a mother is a lifetime of nurturing experience. My mom has had more experience than most.

It was Easter, 2006, and we planned a big family get together. My brother and his family came up from Prince Frederick, Maryland. My sister came up from North Carolina, for a few days, and her oldest daughter and two granddaughters came down from Massachusetts. The patriarch of the family, my dad, said he was going to drive to my house! It's over 450 miles away, and he didn't want us to tell our mother that he was driving! Dad was 85 years old at the time, and he has a clear mind and usually good sense. Dad got the car ready for the trip. He had a cell phone, but turned if off until he was ready to use it? He planned it out, started early in the morning and he made it all the way here. Thank you, Jesus! We ended up telling mother that day he was on his way, and then she really started worrying. All was well. God was with us.

Wade and Jen couldn't come at Easter because of school. When the semester was over in May, they came to Maryland and we had a great, long visit.

When I returned home after breaking my hip, the occupational therapist wouldnt let me take a shower until the grab bars were installed. A carpenter came over to do this, on recommendation of a girlfriend. His name is Jim. I was getting along just fine, taking outpatient rehabilitation, swimming, meeting the neighbors. I was out of the wheelchair and using a walker, until my bones fully mended. Jim called me later, in June. I ended up going out with him, but little did I know that he would come over to get me in a pick-up truck! I have a broken femur. My hip was not working. I couldnt raise my leg and I was using a walker. There was no way I could get into the truck by myself. Jim picked me up, folded me and put me into the truck. I felt like I was getting kidnapped! Well, I must like the excitement and adventure. Jim and I are still together and we have a very good relationship. I believe God wants Jim in my life, or He wants me in Jims life.

In June of 2007, I started attending the Mid-Atlantic Community Church.
Little did I know what was in store for me. I knew this was where I belonged from the first service. The Holy Spirit fills my being. I cant explain how GREAT I feel there. Theres so much love. We are a family in Christ. I know you understand, Dana, since we met at Bible Study.

This is the latest out of the ordinary event in my life. On February 18th, 2008, I was cooking beans in an electric pressure cooker. Hearing the cooker slow down and steam cut off, I went over to open it. The green light was on and right next to the light it read I OPEN. I did just that. I pushed the handle back, which was a safety feature, and pressed down on the lid. Hot beans, steam, and liquid came spewing out, hitting me in my face, neck and hands. I quickly turned around and hot beans landed on my back and shoulders! I was screaming non-stop. Imagine the pain! My face and hands felt like they were on fire! Jim and a friend, Rick, were in the house, only on a different floor. They ran into the kitchen in time to see me fall. Wet beans were sprayed all over the place and the floor was slippery. I was still screaming and said I feel like I'm on fire! Spray me!. Jim picked up the spray nozzle on the sink and sprayed water on me while I was on the floor. It helped for a few seconds. While Jim picked me up and set me in a chair, Rick called 911. When he lifted the phone, my sister was on the line. She just happened to be calling at the same time this was going on, or else she has a sixth sense about what's happening to me? We live right behind a fire house. So the fire department was at the door in about five minutes. I was leaning over the sink spraying cool water on the burned areas. The 911 operator was still on the line and she made me stop! I was in so much PAIN!!! The lead EMT came in and I said I Can I spray water on my burns? I He looked over the burns and said go ahead. They put me on a stretcher and drove me around to the front side of the firehouse. They gave me morphine but it took a little while to lessen the pain. The lead technician said Youre in luck. There's an available helicopter and it will be here in two minutes. Precisely two minutes later, the helicopter lands in the large field next to the firehouse. All the times wed watched them land from our back deck, I never thought I'd be on one. Here I was flying straight up in the sky, but in no condition to enjoy the ride. The pilot said Well be at the Johns Hopkins Burn Unit in eight minutes. So we were. This event was really an ordeal for me. I was diagnosed with 2nd degree burns, which was good. If they had been 3rd degree burns, surgery and skin grafts would be required. The burns turned into blisters and drained, then peeled off. When I was in the Burn ICU the head doctor came in and said What happened to you? I replied The pressure cooker exploded. He said You were cooking beans. Weren't you? In amazement, I said How did you know that? He explained that every pressure cooker victim who came into the Burn Unit, while he was on duty, was there due to cooking beans in the pressure cooker. Too bad there weren't warnings on the cookers! I stayed in Johns Hopkins Hospital for four days. They taught me how to clean, apply medications and bandage my burns. Being antiseptic is the key to good burn healing. Everyday I showered with proper water temperature, water pressure and the right soap. After all I have been through, my faith is stronger than ever. God is always with me. He helped everything turn out just right. I was in the BICU within 20 minutes of the event. I have no scars and I could have been very badly scarred with the pressure cooker explosion! Who came up to help take of me? My sister - an angel. Joanne dressed all of the burns, two or more times a day. She cooked, shopped and did as much as she possibly could to help out for ten days! I am continually blessed by God.

Im a medical basket case, but Ive got the highest power on my side. I know we have to follow our doctorsinstructions, take medications as they prescribe. We have to eat according to our diets. Exercise a little everyday. This is of monumental importance! Exercise makes you feel so much better. Not only do your muscles get stronger and firmer, but you burn fat and your body produces good hormones. So you feel better in a couple of different ways.

This is probably more than you ever wanted to know about me. This is a testimony about God in my life and how great He is! I said that my work on earth was not done. I believe this is part of my work left to be done. I know that some day, my soul will be in heaven. A life of eternity with God. No one can ask for more than that.

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